It's been awhile. The last several weeks I have spent most of my time either at the cancer clinic or in bed. This has been a tough race. With just one week left of radiation I can finally see the finish line. A few weeks ago I ended up with an infection which delayed my treatment and left me very sick. My doctors gave me some time to regain my strength to continue treatment. They stopped chemo to prevent furthur illness, my body literally couldn't take anymore. The last few treatments of radiation have left me lifeless so I am spending much time resting which I am told is to be expected. The up side of all this and there is always an upside is that I have seen how truly loved I am. I have grown closer to my family my wife, daughters, and I have a deeper love for one another. My beautiful Lord has been by my side every step of the way. I have called on His name in my waking hours and in my sleep. I have had a deeper need for him. He has brought me to humility and I have seen my need for his grace. He has given me assurance of my salvation. He has brought so many of you to lift me up when I felt like giving up. For all of that I am grateful. Six weeks after radiation I will be retested to see if all the treatment has paid off. I long to hear the words "you are cancer free". Please keep praying.
Friday, July 9, 2010
Down the home stretch
It's been awhile. The last several weeks I have spent most of my time either at the cancer clinic or in bed. This has been a tough race. With just one week left of radiation I can finally see the finish line. A few weeks ago I ended up with an infection which delayed my treatment and left me very sick. My doctors gave me some time to regain my strength to continue treatment. They stopped chemo to prevent furthur illness, my body literally couldn't take anymore. The last few treatments of radiation have left me lifeless so I am spending much time resting which I am told is to be expected. The up side of all this and there is always an upside is that I have seen how truly loved I am. I have grown closer to my family my wife, daughters, and I have a deeper love for one another. My beautiful Lord has been by my side every step of the way. I have called on His name in my waking hours and in my sleep. I have had a deeper need for him. He has brought me to humility and I have seen my need for his grace. He has given me assurance of my salvation. He has brought so many of you to lift me up when I felt like giving up. For all of that I am grateful. Six weeks after radiation I will be retested to see if all the treatment has paid off. I long to hear the words "you are cancer free". Please keep praying.
Sunday, May 23, 2010
A word of Gratitude
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Please allow me to express my gratitude for your extraordinary kindness. Thank you all so much for all the support! We are fully aware of the magnitude of your generosity and our hearts are overwhelmed with appreciation.
I completed my first week of treatment Friday. Aside from some nausea, extreme fatigue by day and wakefulness by night I am happy to report no serious complications thus far.
Thank you so much for everything!
May God bless you all. Yes, I pray that God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ will give each of you His fullest blessings, and His peace in your hearts and your lives. All my prayers for you are full of praise to God! When I pray for you, my heart is full of joy, Because of all your wonderful help...
Philippians 1:1-5
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Under the Sun
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Here is the report after a full day of doctors visits. I am unfortunately not cured as we knew. I am healing well from my surgery and am ready to undergo the next stage of treatment. I will start an aggressive combination of radiation and chemotherapy May 17 in Albuquerque. Radiation will be 5 days a week for 6-7 weeks. Chemotherapy will be 5 days straight for the first week and then will be tapered off with a total of 12 treatments I think. I will have an exact schedule this Friday. There is a stump so to speak of the tumor in the Mediastinum, the region between the lungs so it puts me in the high risk category. Meaning great care and precision will have to be taken during radiation to prevent much damage to the right lung. Damage is inevitable so I will most likely be on oxygen at some point. I still have positive nodes that were inoperable. Without a procedure that can be done down the road my voice will not be normal again due to nerve damage during surgery. My Radiation Oncologist said the disease is serious, high risk, and life threatening. As far as my prognosis, how long do I have? We did not want to go there we will leave that in the hand of God.
Solomon said in Ecclesiastes 9, "The race is not to the swift, Nor the battle to the strong, Nor bread to the wise, Nor riches to men of understanding, Nor favor to men of skill; But time and chance happen to them all. For man also does not know his time: Like fish taken in a cruel net, Like birds caught in a snare, So the sons of men are snared in an evil time, When it falls suddenly upon them." I will follow Solomon's exhortation to live joyfully with the wife whom I love all the days of my vain life which God has given me under the sun; for it is my portion in life, and in the labor which I perform under the sun. Whatever my hand finds to do, I will do it with my might!
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Why do we suffer?
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Tell me why we suffer again? And why it doesn't end soon enough? I am in my third week post surgery. I feel my self getting stronger each day. I have been walking a little further, a little faster, getting in and out of bed is not as much of a chore as it was just two weeks ago, and I am breathing better. So really I should be singing a happy tune because I am healing just as fast as could be expected. I don't know about any of you but a man just doesn't feel quite like a man when he is being waited on hand and foot nice as it is. My wife and daughters have been at my beck and call. I am ready to get back to work ready to be over this season of suffering. Many of you have shared your particular trials and sufferings which have truly been an encouragement to me. We suffer so we can understand and love others who suffer by having first hand experience. The Lord uses suffering to strengthen our faith, produce patience, and make us complete. That's what James tells us in the scripture. Patient I am not, faithful in Him alone who is God without a doubt, and I know He will complete the work in me. When I am on the other side of this whole deal I pray He will have given me the wisdom I need to comfort others as I have been comforted by so many of you.
He cannot heal who has not suffered much,
For only sorrow sorrow understands.
They will not come for healing at our touch
Who have not seen the scars upon our hands.
Author Unknown.
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Transition
Gilbert was released from the hospital yesterday. When we arrived at my daughter's house we received a stack of cards! Perfect timing! We greatly appreciate all the phone calls and visits! Thank you all so much for the encouragement and support! We have been overwhelmed with how much everyone cares, it is such a blessing!
Our daughters have been taking great care of us! I don't know what we would do without them. We are getting spoiled.
Today has been the toughest day so far. Transitioning from epidural and heavy intravenous meds to oral tablets is a bit of a challenge. We will be staying here in Albuquerque through the week. Gilbert has a followup Monday and hopefully we will be going home shortly after that. I will be "Driving Miss (Mr.) Daisy" for 4wks and He won't be doing any lifting for at least 6wks. Gilbert will see his Pulmonary Dr. and Oncologist in a few weeks to set up a plan for radiation and chemotherapy. We thank you all for everything!
Pat
Friday, April 9, 2010
Surgery Day
This is BJ, signing in for my Daddy. It was a long day in the surgical waiting area watching the play by play of patient 97148 scroll down the screen. It was slow going to start the surgery was delayed a few hours due to some complications with the previous patient. As for my dad what was a planned lobectomy ended up being a Pneumonectomy, removal of his entire left lung. Dr. Wehr also removed several lymph nodes. Unfortunately he was not able to remove all of the cancerous nodes and chemo and radiation will follow some time after recovery. Dr. Wehr did say he was very pleased he did the surgery he said the disease was severe and had he not done the surgery my dad would not have made it for more than a few months. We praise God this decision was made! And much thanks to Dr. Patel Oncologist for being aggressive and seeking out Dr. Wehr to see my Dad's case and thanks to Dr. Wehr's confidence in taking my Dad's case. He is a very skilled and brilliant surgeon and exceptionally upbeat!
We met our Daddy in the Coronary Care Unit around 5:00 this evening. He was of course in and out of sleep but was waving and trying to talk. He recognized his girls and asked for his grand babies to be put on his bed with him. The grand babies were at home but he was thinking of them. He will be monitored well through the night and expected to be in the CC unit for the next few days and then later moved to a different floor for recovery.
My Dad was very popular today he had many visitors prior to surgery, phone calls, well wishes and prayers. Before he went in to surgery he said, "with a support team like this I am sure to win". Thank you so much for all the love!
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
Onward
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I am a big baby when it comes to pain. Just ask my wife Pat. I am allergic to needles and knives. The idea of being cut through the side of my chest and my ribs being spread apart to remove half my left lung is not sounding very appealing to me. My doctors agree it is the best way to go. I on the other hand am thinking let's call the whole thing off. I have non-small cell lung cancer and the only way to get rid of it is going to be non-painless. A week in the hospital with a chest tube draining fluids and blood out of my chest with three weeks of recovery is what is to be expected.
Lately I have not felt up for the challenge of "fighting cancer". I've asked Pat, why doesn't someone just take me out back and shoot me? I wasn't joking when I said I was a big baby when it came to pain. But for anyone who knows me you know I am a man when it comes to life. The good news is my doctors say I am strong and young and fit! Did you get that? Strong, young, and fit! They say I have a good chance because of my being so young and fit and strong. I'm glad someone thinks so.
From the words of Vance Havner, "'I Feel Like Traveling On" is a good song but I had better keep traveling on whether I feel like it or not. It is too far to go back. The side road is worse. This is no place to stop. And the only way out is on."
So, onward I will go. Surgery is scheduled first thing Friday morning.
"If ye continue in my word, then are ye my disciples indeed."
Friday, March 26, 2010
Whirlwind
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The last few weeks have been quite a whirlwind. After a series of several tests including CT scan, Bronchoscopy, PET scan, MRI, and several doctor visits in between I have officially been diagnosed with Stage 3 Non-Small Cell Lung Cancer.
Ugh! It's CANCER! Like a whirlwind, air whirling violently and moving forward, I have been tossed around by winds of emotion, fear, anger, everything. Today I am resolved to move forward with purpose.
The Psalms say, God is my refuge and strength He is my present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, even though the earth be removed, And though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea; Though the waters roar and be troubled, Though the mountains shake with its swelling. There is a river whose streams shall make glad the city of God, The holy place of the tabernacle of the Most High. God is in the midst of her, she shall not be moved. God shall help her, just at the break of dawn...The Lord of hosts is with us.
The Lord is with me! I will have major lung surgery in two weeks. Depending on the outcome of the surgery a combination of radiation and chemotherapy will be determined.
Thank you all for your love and support! I feel your prayers.
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